Regrets of the Dying

Interesting article from the Guardian where a hospice nurse recorded the most common regrets of those actively dying. Its not surprising that “wish I worked less” was a common regret but amazingly not the first.

“I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

This was the most common regret according to Bronnie Ware, the nurse who recorded people’s thoughts at the end of their lives. Not surprisingly, two of the other top five regrets stem from the inability to be themselves. Namely “I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings” and “I wish that I had let myself be happier” were numbers three and five, respectively.

So why do we wait ‘til the end of our lives to realize this? I’ve told many people their lung cancer diagnosis. I’ve witnessed the horror of the diagnosis kill people long before they actually leave this world. I’ve also seen others finally live their authentic life when they’re staring down metastatic lung cancer.  

This was given to me from my college sweetheart:

It shouldn’t take a cancer diagnosis to allow us the power to be ourselves. The long-term benefits of finding strength in your uniqueness without bowing to peer pressure is overwhelming. It gives you the freedom to live your life according to your passions and values fulfilling you through a meaningful existence. Exercise the self-compassion necessary to see you through difficult times. Accept yourself for the good and the bad and realize no one can be a better you than you.

So live boldly as your unabashed self and watch your mental health, confidence, relationships blossom.  

Don’t wait ‘til a bad diagnosis forces you to utter regrets.

I took a nine mile hike from Kinsale, Ireland to the coast where I watched the sun sparkle on the water lying on the most comfortable grass Ive ever experienced and enjoyed life for a few hours.